Life is like a wave, which will go up and down. We cannot avoid suffering. Thus, we all need others’ comfort. The following informations show the useful tips to comfort people.

人生就像波浪，会起起落落。我们无法避免痛苦。因此，我们都需要别人的安慰。以下信息显示了安慰人们的有用技巧。

Better not to…

最好不要…

  1. Tell him or her that your situation is worse 跟他比惨
    When someone turns to you, it is clear he or she wants your comfort. Telling “Mine is worse” always means “I can afford the worse situation than yours. So why can’t you?”. Although our thoughts are reasonable and these words sound motivating, the one will still assume you never care about his feelings, for you did not mention something about him.
    当有人想你求助时时，很明显他想要你的安慰。说“我的情况更糟糕”总是意味着“我能承受比你更糟糕的情况。那你为什么不能呢？”虽然我们的想法是合理的，这些话听起来很激励人心，但那个人仍然会认为你从不在乎他的感受，因为你没有提到有关他的事情。

  2. Tell words like “I already told you…” 说出诸如“我已经告诉过你了……”之类的话
    Never tell words like “I already told you…”, “Were I you, it would not …”, “Have you thunk of my words?” When we talk like this, we do wish that the bad would have not happened if the one would follow our suggestios. However, in the occasion when the one need comfort, these words may always bring extra meanings like “You made you bed, now lie on it”, “You do your math”, “Put the stone and hit your legs”. It cannot be like your helping him out.
    永远不要说“我已经告诉过你……”，“如果我是你，就不会……”，“你把我的话扔掉了吗？”当我们这样说话时，我们确实希望如果一个人听从我们的建议，坏事就不会发生。然而，在需要安慰的场合，这些话可能总会带来额外的含义，比如“你自作自受”，“你自己解决”，“搬石头砸自己的脚”。这不可能像是你在帮助他。

  3. Give advice immediately 立即提供建议
    As the saying goes, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do”. To comfort us is the same thing. Therefore, do not give advice to the one immediately. It is not the time. When doing this, the one who longs for the comfort may have to think “Am so stupid I that I need to be given lessons by you?” Things are in a wrong way!
    常言道：“入乡随俗”。安慰我们也是一样的。因此，不要立即给建议给他们。时机还未到！这么做的时候，那些渴望安慰的人可能不得不认为“我是傻到需要被你教训？”事情在朝坏的方向发展！

As a consequent, what can we do to have it not happen?
因此，我们能做些什么来避免它发生？

  1. Think what he thinks 想他所想
    Everyone was born in different backgrounds, so their personalities, lifestyles, hobbies and minds are quite different. The most important part is to think what he thinks. We cannot force all to be like us. Only in this way can we shine in the sky together.
    每个人出生在不同的背景中，所以他们的个性、生活方式、爱好和思想都大不相同。最重要的是想他所想。我们不能强迫所有人都像我们一样做事。只有这样，我们才能一起在天空中发光。

  2. Have the one speak out the pain 让那个人说出痛苦
    The one has been in disappointment and in blue for a long time. So just have the one speak out, in order to clear his mind, open his cheats, meet the better himself. Also, we need to listen to him carefully and patiently. You can cut in to further the process if you are good at it. Anyway, you should be like “Whatever, wherever, however, you can turn to me and I’ll always help you out. I’ll be your lighthouse forever”. Even if you say nothing, a hug can warm him much.
    那个人已经失望和抑郁很长时间了。所以只要让那个人说出来，才能理清思路，敞开胸襟，遇见更好的自己。此外，我们需要仔细和耐心地倾听。如果你擅长，你可以插话以进一步推进该过程。无论如何，你应该像是“无论如何，无论在哪里，无论怎么样，你可以求助于我，我都会帮助你。我会永远是你的灯塔”。即使你一句不算，一个拥抱也能温暖他的内心。

  3. Offer ideas if necessary 必要时提供想法
    One can not always downhill any longer. So we have to find way out. But no offering ideas immediately until he is getting happier.
    一个人不能再总是下坡了。所以我们必须找到出路。但是在他开心之前，不要立即提出想法。

That is it! Drama will come to an end but our life will not. We just do hope we can live, happy and joyful!
就是这样！戏会落幕，但我们的人生不会。我们希望我们能快乐生活！